The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
