Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
