bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize