so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize