Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
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