if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I'm having to shit out rocks
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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