That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Two words: nipple clamps
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