Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina

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(418): View more from Quebec

I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate

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(540): View more from Virginia

please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.

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(209): View more from California

HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????

(606): View more from Kentucky

We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(901): View more from Tennessee

guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.

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(206): View more from Washington

That's why there are breakfast margaritas.

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(314): View more from Missouri

Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.

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(384): View more from

So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.

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(316): View more from Kansas

IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH

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