don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment