I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
