I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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