I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
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the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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