Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
