Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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