Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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