I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I currently don't understand fingers.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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