Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize