I accidentally had phone sex last night
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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