I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize