I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
