Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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