i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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