Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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