while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
