wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize