Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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