I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize
