Don't you send me to vm
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
