Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
