btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.