I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
