So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
