Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I am one with the molecules
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
