the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
