Well douche your snatch and let's go!
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
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