a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
this beer tastes like vomit already
I love having hate sex.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
