At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
