Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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