break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize