Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
