they're like a gay fantastic four
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
