Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
We left an ass print on the piano.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize