Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize