I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
