More tranny stories later!
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Randomize
