Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
