1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
barbara walters just said penis...
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
