gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
