Me. At least after what I've been through.
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
