oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
