I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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