If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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